-

 If She Didn’t Say Yes, I Couldn’t Say Yes: Ode to Alternative Caregivers

Every foster parent needs someone who unequivocally will step in and pick up where the foster parent runs out of time and energy. Every foster parent needs someone who might not sign the foster care contract, but signs up all the same to come alongside you and get the work of loving a traumatized child done!

My alternative caregiver has stayed up all night at my home and hers with a newborn when there is no maternity leave, so I can work the next day or be coherent to spend time with my other children. When I take kids late at night, she stays with them the next day so I can get to work and they can sleep late and stay home to unwind for a day. She meets social workers when I can’t. She picks up at day care, and she’s taken foster kids to the dentist. She doesn’t ask what the child is like and doesn’t expect him/her to be an angel; She still says yes when I do. She lets us use her pool to teach foster kids to swim and to spend a day unwinding together laughing and splashing.
She picks up groceries, and picks up kids at school. She’s baked lasagnas big enough for 3 families of 6-8. She’s taken the keys to my home during a hard time and had it cleaned when I returned.

Thank you Kim for all you do to encourage and equip my family (and many others) to continue to serve kids in foster care!

She’s not just there physically to help, but often bears the heavy burdens with me of loving kids that have been abused and grieves with me when kids leave. She cries with me and for them, and answers texts before 8am and sometimes after 9pm. When they see her, they run to her too. 

Another Fostering Faithfully alternative caregiver recently agreed to take a baby weaning off meth and needing methadone for a weekend of nothing but screaming. She still signed up. Another alternative caregiver stepped in so a family could go on a dream vacation with their biological kids they’d already promised and saved for. Another alternative caregiver father stepped in to pick up a crying baby up at daycare and meet a biological mother. It was emotional and tough, but he still signed up. Weddings, funerals, emergencies, surgeries, travel plans, or just plain out exhaustion from the emotional needs of some foster kids: alternative caregivers swoop in!

Alternative caregivers provide foster families much needed time for their children and family, and rest to meet the ongoing demands of the social services system and the emotional toil it takes. Alternative caregivers are another stable person to show foster kids that adults will care for them and meet their needs. An alternative caregiver can be a friend of the family, but to formally be one you must be approved by the Department of Social Services.

Can't Foster? You can still love and hold foster kids when their families for a season can't!
She's in her happy place!




Comments

Post a Comment

Thank you for sharing with us.

Popular posts from this blog

Ode to Foster Daddies!

-
Image
This Father's Day, I'd like to pay a tribute to all the Daddies that love kids that are not really "theirs" just like they are.  This hard calling might be easier for a mama that's nurturing and typically wired more for compassion and empathy, but foster Daddies are right there in the trenches cleaning up spit up or vomit-filled car seats, and changing plenty of dirty diapers for kids that will never remember their sacrifices. He gets up with another man's baby in the middle of the night. When no one shows up for visits, He shows up to play Legos. He speaks gently and graciously to a single mother whose drug abuse impacted his life greatly. When no one else is willing to step up for a child, He does. He puts together a crib suddenly for a teen foster child, and her new baby. When his wife has no dinner plans due to the chaos that reigns and 400 minutes she spent on the phone with child welfare issues, he scrambles eggs or hits the drive th...
Read more

Guest Blogger: Foster Mama Reflects on the First Hello and Goodbye

-
Image
In May of 2016, our family made a decision to change our lives forever. We decided to join a system I'd been part of as a baby over 42 years ago. We believed God called us to grow our family one little life at a time through foster care. We were licensed in September, and then by October we were picking up the 2 week old baby boy we'd been praying for. For 18 1/2 months we helped him grow and learn. For 81 weeks, we watched as he explored this awesome world. For 567 days, we taught him what a safe, stable and loving family/home is like. Now, this baby boy lives with his forever family, a family we love, who will give him a lifetime of chances and opportunities. Is foster care difficult? ABSOLUTELY! God never said following Him would be easy. It's hard to see his empty bed and it's quiet without his footsteps. But, it's incredible to see how God protected him from harm, used us to care for him for a season, and then provided him a family that will be th...
Read more
-
Image
Our Foster Care Journey: Stepping out to try Respite Care By Mary H, Fostering Faithfully Respite Care provider, now licensing!   Just over two years ago I began to feel the tug on my heart regarding children in foster care. I felt like I heard the need for foster parents advertised everywhere and even spent time crying in our living room floor heartbroken for the children with no one to tuck them in at night. So I started praying. God, what can I do? I need to do something, but I don't know what? Well, the Lord answers prayers and soon after Foothills Community Church played a video talking about foster care in our area advertising an evening class to get more information. I told my husband I had to go and he, not quite sure what to do with my new conviction, went with me. The class and continued prayers only increased our belief that we were supposed to get involved with foster care and it gave us a place to start. A big part of me was ready to jump right in...
Read more